Friday, August 1, 2008

What Help Wanted Ads Really Mean...

We found this online and thought it was funny ;>)

Job Recruiter Lingo:

Competitive Salary
We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.

Join our Fast-Pace Team
We have no time to train you.

Casual Work Atmosphere
We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up; well, a couple of the real daring guys wear earrings.

Must be Deadline Oriented
You’ll be six months behind schedule on your first day.

Some Overtime Required
Some time each night and some time each weekend.

Duties Will Vary
Anyone in the office can boss you around.

Must have an Eye for Detail
We have no quality control

Apply in Person
If you're old, fat or ugly, you'll be told the position has been filled.

No Phone Calls Please
We've filled the job; our call for resumes is just a legal formality.

Seeking Candidates with a Wide Variety of Experience
You'll need it to replace three people who just left.

Problem-Solving Skills a Must
You’re walking into a company in perpetual chaos

Good Communication Skills
Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want, and do it.

Require Team Leadership Skills
You’ll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.

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Truly a 'Burgh Thing!

Truly a 'Burgh Thing!
by Randy Bish, Pittsburgh Tribune Review

Job News and Information for Job Seekers and Recruiters

Job News and Information for Job Seekers and Recruiters